Rabbit, rabbit. It is October. Hard to believe! The last post on this blog was two years ago, also in October, also from Mexico. I clearly remember having the intention to continue the blog upon my return to the US, but that never happened.
That post was essentially about a universal sign that I should stay in Mexico - but I didn't. And although there were many reasons that I didn't just stay in Mexico in October 2014, the biggest reason was: 1.) stuff
I had an apartment full of STUFF. Things, things, and more things. Beautiful things, art things, tea things, but all things that I was responsible for - that I could not just abandon in Boston and forget about forever. Most people assumed that the most difficult part of moving to Mexico would be saying "goodbye" to friends and family. But, this isn't 1916, where I board a big ship, wave with my hanky from the deck, and sail away, never to return again. It is 2016, and my friends and family are dispersed across the globe, but most within a $400 or less airplane ride away. So, the hardest part for me was the stuff. And getting rid of the stuff wasn't even the hardest part. Giving things away, especially to friends and family who I knew needed certain things was great. But having to confront every single belonging from 31 years on this planet was utterly exhausting. It took months. And I still didn't finish it.
Literally 10 hours before my plane took off, I was throwing away/donating Kyrgyz dictionaries, trinkets that I had treasured as a child, a musical jewelry box gifted to me for my sweet sixteen, every report card and school report from high school to college. In the 10 hours before the plane took off, it became a bit easier, but this should not have taken months. And I should not still have bags and boxes of things I was too attached to part with at my parents house. But I do.
Im my Boston life, I had a tea cabinet full of every type of tea. My tea cabinet was bigger than my entire food cabinet in my Mexico life. Matcha, PG Tips, green tea with roasted brown rice, hibiscus, mint, chai, ginger, lemon. Any type you can imagine, I had it. I drank tea every day, and I loved it. And I couldn't take all of that with me. So, a few days ago, my mom brought all of that tea to her school, and she gave it away. She said people loved it - that it was a real treat. And part of me craved a piping hot mug of PG Tips and was angry that I didn't have it. And so I said to Alex, with a bit of a sad, whiny voice, "My mom gave away all my tea today."
And Alex looked at me with a big smile and said: "What, did you want her to keep it in a tea museum? Someone has to enjoy it."
I couldn't argue with that. I am trying to live lighter, travel lighter, be lighter.
Yesterday was a hard day, trying to adjust to all of the changes. But, a walk along the Malecón in Campeche was a great reset. Looking out over the perfectly still sea, empty for miles upon miles, I was reminded to constantly clear the old and make room for the present. The beauty of a pelican gliding just inches from the surface of the water. A school of silver fish glinting just below the surface. Fishermen getting ready to head out for the day. Signs along the walk reading, "Cuidemos el manglar, es fuente de vida," which means, "We care for the mangroves, it is a fountain of life." The sign doesn't say, "You should care for the mangroves." It isn't a hope. It isn't a SHOULD. It is stated to the universe that WE do take care of the mangroves. I love that.
I have less stuff. I have less stuff because it lets me have a better, happier life with more freedom. I will repeat that a few thousand times.